It’s impossible to ignore-Photos flood social media of dancing priests and prancing prelates-a veritable Chorus Line of clerics who boogie on down the nave, jumping up and down like repressed adolescents. One expects them to break out singing and strutting Cabaret:
♬“Come to the Cabaret, Put on your dancing shoes,
Come taste the wine, Come hear the band,
What good’s permitting some prophet of doom to wipe every smile away.
Life is a Cabaret, Old Chum.” ♬
Welcome to the Synodal Dance Floor. The satire practically writes itself. The Synodal prelates have even developed their own ecclesiastical choreography. Accompaniment means everyone moving to the same beat; inclusion means making sure no one is left off the dance floor. Never mind that the Church is on fire. Everyone must be welcomed into the mosh pit, accompanied through the steps, and encouraged to keep dancing without smelling the smoke.
The Francis/Leo Synodal Vatican replaced ‘Abba, Father’ (Mk. 14:36) with ABBA’s ‘Dancing Queen’ as it tap dances on the edge of an abyss. What’s the sudden fascination with rave in the nave? The sacred must be shunned, and the sacrifice is diminished by the spectacle in the newly anointed Synodal Church of the Dancing Queens.
It’s the latest craze as prelates and priests tear up the dance floor, bust out the Synodal Shuffle and tap dance their way toward an ecclesiastical freefall, while the Church slips into a spiritual tailspin. The sanctuary becomes a stage, the prelates become performers, and the liturgical life of the Church becomes a production. (Not unlike the blasphemous Cecilia Gentili, trans funeral at NY St. Patrick’s Cathedral.)
Enough dancing around the issue.
Five alarm bells should be blaring. The Church is in flames, while the prelates are perfecting their footwork. Souls are in jeopardy, the faithful are bewildered, and the shepherds have apparently discovered their inner John Travolta and forgotten their apostolic lineage. The tragedy is not merely their gut wrenching frivolity. It’s the apparent inability to even recognize the gravity of the moment. When the Church desperately needs serious faithful shepherds, it’s plagued by self-absorbed showmen who preach not about salvation, but about dance tempo. When the Church needs repentance, it gets a performance art, and when it needs a fire brigade, it gets a dance troupe.
The Synodal Showmen even invented a THEOLOGY around their latest two-step doctrine-guaranteed to keep them dancing around the Truth while the Church tap dances into spiritual oblivion and endless pratfalls.
Who else but Cardinal Blase Cupich (the Pope Maker) to introduce Catholics into the lofty doctrine entitled, “Synodality is the Church learning to dance.”
Cupich’s Synodal Theology of Dance
The Synodal Church of Dancing is brought to you by the preeminent religious scholar, Cardinal Blase Cupich. In an effort to decode the gibberish moniker “synodal church”, Chicago’s Cupich draws upon stirring imagery and memories of his childhood to capture the essence of the rocking Leo Synodal Church. Cue the Music! Gather around the big synodal tent of inclusion, unfurl the rainbow flag, kick up your heels and blast the tunes.
The official Vatican News Service proudly unveiled and endorsed the Cupich Dogma of Dance featuring Blase’s deep theological musings on synodal side steps, quoted extensively in an article entitled, Cardinal Cupich: Synodality is like Dancing:
“One day it occurred to me that my experience of kolo dancing and its many elements had much to offer for understanding synodality. Like the dance, it too offers a means of socialization, but in the life of the church. So, synodality invites the entire community to take responsibility for moving forward in unison, attentive to the Holy Spirit and to one another.
Both dance and synodality require a shift from individual performance to collective harmony, transforming a group of distinct individuals into a singular, moving body.” (Ed: like a Congo Line?)
Gird yourself for more Cupichian profundity as he posits the penultimate theological question facing humanity:
“How does the rhythm of dance mirror the spirit of synodality?”
Are you impressed? The Synodal Church has traded Aquinas’ Summa Theologica for its own Summa Choreographica. Aquinas gave us the Summa; the Synodal Church gives us the Samba. Steady yourself as Cupich further expounds on the movement of the spirit to illustrate the essence of the rhythm of synodality:
“In dance, movement never begins in a vacuum; it begins with the music. Before dancers can take a step, they must cultivate a deep, attentive silence to internalize the rhythm, tempo, and mood of the piece.
Apparently, before the Church can proclaim the Gospel, it must first find the beat. Cupich’s synodal approach morphs from, Be still and know that I am God, into Be still and find the rhythm. Foolishly, the Apostles and Church Fathers managed to proclaim the Gospel without first taking a required course in ecclesiastical choreography.
Wait-there’s more from the dancing machine of the College of Cardinals:
Cupich hums on:
“Synodality operates on the exact same frequency. Its foundational step is not speaking or enacting policy, but deeply listening—to the Holy Spirit, to scripture, to tradition, and listening attentively to one another, especially those on the margins. Just as a dancer who ignores the music becomes disconnected from the ensemble, members of a community who fail to listen cease to act in a synodal way. Listening to the shared rhythm ensures everyone is moving to the same song.”
The new commandments of FREQUENCY AND SHARED RHYTHM now dominate the teaching. Who knew that Blase Cupich possessed a doctorate in the dogma of dance? What pontifical academy endowed this rarified certificate of academic excellence? This will certainly be a demarcation line in the patristics of the Catholic Church: Go forth and dance to your heart’s content. Obviously, the Leo Vatican is dazzled by Cupich’s Dancing Dubia-a truly a historic and weighty exegesis on synodal shake and sway.
More Cupichian theology continues in the article:
“Dancing also involves creativity and adaptability. Dancers must navigate the pull of gravity by picking up their feet, adjust to the weight and momentum of their partners, and adapt when a misstep occurs.
Synodality requires a willingness to step onto the floor without a rigid, predetermined outcome. In fact, it is inherently a journey into uncharted territory. It embraces the creative tension of dialogue, recognizing that Holy Spirit can disrupt our neatly planned routines.
When a community encounters tension or disagreement, synodality asks them not to walk off the stage, but to use that friction to pivot, adapt, and find a new way forward together. And just as dancers are to avoid stepping on one another’s toes, turning synodal dialogue into an argument would be a misstep. {S}imilarly, a synodal path expands the tent. It asks the community to look at who is missing from the dance floor and actively invite them in.”
Can you imagine the howls of disgust from the saints and martyrs over this silly synodal supercilious superficiality?
Cardinal Luis Tagle-the New Dean of the College of Cardinals
Cupich is one of many prelates that enjoy tripping the light fantastic. Meet Leo’s newest and most prestigious appointment, Cardinal Luis Tagle, the new Dean of the College of Cardinals, Tagle, too, is famous for burning up the dance floor. Tagle now holds the responsibility as Dean of the College of Cardinals, which among other roles, is to summon the cardinals to Rome on the pope’s behalf, particularly for a papal conclave to elect a new pontiff. Most notably, Cardinal Tagle is probably best known for his oft’ displayed dancing and singing talents.
The dancing Cardinal Tagle
Happy Clappy Tagle
Tagle loves to dance.
Cardinal Dolan in the chorus kick line with the NY Radio City Rockettes,
The Catholic Church does not need prelates who dance in the aisles. If this is the hallmark of Synodality, then pitch your synodal inclusive rainbow tent in San Francisco, ditch your red zucchetto, flee Rome and head over to Broadway, boys. When the House of God is on fire, the shepherds should be sounding the alarm not rehearsing their dance moves. Who is left to put out the flames? The Church is being subjected to an apocalyptic spectacle of frivolity when the moment demands the gravity of leadership and holy men.
The heart of this absurdity is the grotesque inversion of priorities now imposed by a synodal system manufactured and promoted to replace the Holy Roman Catholic Church. Synodality is undefined for a specific purpose to supplant the structure, undermine perennial teaching and radicalize practices of the Catholic Church. Nothing distracts like a spectacle—and nothing makes doctrine easier to ignore than a dance routine in the sanctuary.
If all are welcome on the dance floor, who, then is watching over the flock?